If I know anything about superpowers, it is that to those who possess them(super heroes), they are tools that make live somewhat easier. Emotional Intelligence, like every other superpower, helps an individual navigate through the complexities of everyday life with ease.
This superpower is the key to having better relationships, excelling at leadership, communicating effectively, succeeding at school and work and resolving conflicts. There is literally no area of life where emotional intelligence cannot be applied—with mind blowing results to show for it.
Traditionally, superheroes are born with superpowers or acquire their powers through some crazy science experiment gone wrong.
But you know the fascinating thing about this superpower? It can be learnt.
It’s never too late to start learning E.l so, not to worry, you’re not too late to the party.
Now, What is Emotional Intelligence?
Also referred to as Emotional quotient (E.Q), it is the ability to identify, understand, control and master emotions and feelings, yours and those of others.
Jack Meyer and Peter Salovey defined it as the capacity to regulate feelings and use them to guide our actions.
Emotionally Intelligent people leverage on their mastery of emotions to become better communicators; see problems from a different perspective and proffer solutions; win people over by creating good relationships and resolve conflicts.
How do you use E.I to resolve conflicts?
This involves —
•Delayed gratification: You know, resisting the urge to punch someone in the face for being unnecessarily irritating because you want to achieve lasting peace.
•Self awareness: Identifying how you feel and why you feel that way.
•Listening: Learning how to hear people out and understand their perspective.
•Empathy: Putting yourself in people’s shoes in order to understand their feelings. It also involves the realisation that their feelings are valid.
•Communicating effectively: Clearly stating that you understand people’s feelings while letting them know how you feel. Communicate to resolve the conflict not to aggravate it.
•Compromising: Agreeing to meet halfway or reach some other mutual agreement.
•The three magic words: Saying thank you, I’m sorry and please at your own discretion to defuse tension.
•Forgiveness: Letting go of hard feelings.
When next you’re faced with a situation that may result to a full-blown argument, withdraw, articulate your feelings, listen and understand the other party’s argument.
Clearly communicate with the intent of achieving peace; apologise if need be and reach a compromise.
Nobody is born, loving conflict and misunderstandings. These are learnt consciously or unconsciously.
Since those can be learnt, I believe we can also learn to understand our emotions and those of others in order to live peacefully.
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